Monday, October 08, 2007Y
11:00 PM
i dunno wat is happening to mi now.. i seems kinda going bonkers now liaox le.. is there anyone out there now tat can save mi mahx.. hu is there to help mi.. =[was tinking thru everything jus now.. i dunno y i will start to tink abt all tis oso.. but yea.. from all my tinking jus now.. i gus all the problems lies on mi bahx.. its jus mi i gus.. its jus mi not being able to control myself.. its jus mi oways starting all the quarrels.. its jus mi oways keep say her.. its jus mi oways giving her so much pressure bahx i tink.. everything is mi.. jus mi i gus.. but im tinking.. if anyone were in the situation tat im in.. how would u all feel or do abt it.. can tell mi mahx.. although there is nth i can do now.. now i rly hope to noe in wat ways am i wrong in.. seriously pls tell mi hao mahx..
was tinking oso.. in the beginning y am i working so hard everyday to earn tis xue han qian till my body r aching here n there but i still continue to work.. y am i doing all tis lehx.. y do i hav to work so hard.. n the ans is.. cos i wanted to give her a better life from now on.. wan to fulfil her wish to lead a tai tai life.. wanna help support her uni sch fees if she rly wans to continue study.. wanna be able to get her anything tat she wans or likes.. wanna give her everything the best.. but is it still possible now mahx?? if its not possible anymore den shld i continue to work so hard mahx?? or shld i jus slack off n work to earn enuf for mi to eat n spend jiu hao le.. anyone out there to tell mi mahx??
the tot of putting tattoo once again came into my mind again.. i dunno y.. jus like the other time.. cos of the impact made of mi cause mi to go put the 3 words on my back.. n now i hav the feeling once again.. but y.. is it tat the pain can temp bring my attention away so tat i will feel better.. or is it cos i wanna rember tat tis is the pain tat i hav gone thru.. i rly dunno.. but still.. i din went to put.. as its a promise made.. i said i will stop putting anymore tattoos.. hope i can rly keep to tis promise i made..
dunno y as i tink n say abt all tis.. my tears jiu will auto start to flow down.. t.t tried to control it.. tried to stop it.. but i cant.. i failed again le.. gus im oways so useless bahx.. =[