Friday, June 01, 2007Y
5:07 AM
here im again.. blogging.. gus tis is the onli place where i can release everything out bahx.. hav been tinking thru wat happen earlier again n again.. but whenever i tink of the part when she jus push off my hand n told mi to go away my tears jiu will jus automatically flow down.. i dunno y.. i jus cant seem to control it.. the more i force myself no to cry the more miserable i feel..from the last sms i send her till now there is still no reply yet.. i noe wat i did today was so veri wrong.. n no doubt she will be angry.. but tinking over it again n again.. i rly feel so bad.. im such a asshole.. an idiot.. a good for nth idiot.. its my bad to treat her tis way.. i cfm will regret if anything were to happen to tis relationship cos of tis.. i will nv forgive myself for wat happen today.. its like a dot on a paper.. nth can ever erase it away..
till now im still unable to slp.. how i wish i could noe how is she now.. is she feeling better.. did she had her dinner.. hav she gone to bed.. will she be able to wake up on time for sch tml.. n everyting tings else.. everyting in my mind now is jus her.. her good n her bad.. like i say b4.. no matter wat she do.. the most i will be angry for awhile n everyting will be over veri soon.. but.. haix.. nvm bahx.. saying so much now will make no diff le.. wats done is done.. i cant turn back time to change it oso..
hopefully when i cal her in the morning she would pick up bahx.. i rly hope she will..
baby.. i dunno if u will be reading my blog anymore.. but since everyting happen up till now.. u r in my mind every sec every min.. i miss u so much.. sorry abt my attitude.. sorry for all my bad behaviour.. sorry for all the bad tings tat i hav done.. sorry for all the hurts i hav gave u.. sorry for everyting.. im sincerly sorry..
i shall try to go lie down on bed again to c if i can slp anot.. will update again soon bahx..